Wednesday’s Show Audio — Contract Signing and Cards Keep Rolling

Producer Joe, Wed, 11 Apr 2012 12:00:00 GMT

SEGMENT 1– Charlie Marlow Who Does a Little Work at the 2Fox Is Sitting to Your Left and I Would Like Him to Take His Shirt Off, Today’s Program Is Packed with Joy, I Will Say This Right Now That David Freese Is the Best Player in Major League Baseball, There Are Guys That Are Fragile and Then You Have Freak Injuries with Freese, I Know That the Numbers Will Regress to the Mean & Its Early But You Can’t Discredit Picking Up These Wins Early in the Season, and Looking at the Weather For Opening Day

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SEGMENT 2– The Clown Is Just Standing Outside the Studio Seemingly Waiting For a Grand Entrace with the Oak Ridge Boys Playing Elvira, Chris Hulsey Is In Studio with Talking Points For Some Reason, I Can’t Give Away My Stance Because I Don’t Want to Give Anything Away, I Have Put on Weight For This Fight and I Am About 155 Right Now, How Does He Respond to the Allegations That He Is Thinking About Using Steroids For This Fight, Apparently He Is the Pride of St. Louis, and How He Handles the Fact That Nobody Expects to Win This Fight

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SEGMENT 3– Joe Strauss Joins the Show to Talk About Missing the Segment with Chris Hulsey in the Previous Hour, the Cardinals Keep on Hitting in Cincinnati, the Health with Lance Berkman and His Availabliity, this Works Well to Get Matt Carpenter Some At-Bats This Afternoon, the Development of Mitchell Boggs, the Update with Chris Carpenter and Where Things Stand In Getting Back to Action, the Vibe Surrounding the Team After the First 6 Games of the Season, and the Ozzie Guillen Situation & What Happened with the Orioles When They Went to Cuba for an Exhibition Game in ’99

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SEGMENT 4– Kelly Chase Joins the Show Presented By Appliance Solutions to Discuss Interupting His Brief Job Around Toronto This Morning, Texting Twitter and Everything Never Comes Across Perfectly Clear, Nashville and Detroit Get Things Rolling This Evening Where the Predators Are Getting a Lot of Love, the Blackhawks Series Could Be Determined if Toews Plays, and Do the Kings Have Much of a Chance Against Vancouver in that Opening Series

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SEGMENT 5– Tkachuk’s Phone Is Going Straight to Voicemail This Morning So We Are Going to Call an Audible If You Don’t Mind This Morning, This Gentleman Has Gone From Someone I Dreddred Asking Questions To At One Time and Now I Can’t Get Enough of Him, Mark McGwire Joins the Show to Talk About the Getaway Day Line-Up This Afternoon, the Plan Going Into the Batters Box and Executing, David Freese’s Hot Start to the Season and Continuing to Develop at the Plate While Trying to Stay Healthy, We Have a Team Full of Line Drive Hitters That When They Connect Become Home Run Threats, and the Start for Furcal

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SEGMENT 6– Supplement Superstore Email of the Day

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E-Mail of the Day:

Hello Gentlemen,

Welcome the murder show, aka the freak show that is Producer Joe vs.
Timberfake. Two, 150 lb slight of frame gentlemen. One man has a landing
strip and will be accompanied to the ring by a man named Pretty Paul, who
provides steroids by day and bottoms by night. The other guy is extremely
proud of his haircut, made to resemble a homosexual trainer on a reality
show, but refuses to show it off without the proper product in it. His
trainer Jose regularly knocks him out, and some chick named Casey bloodied
his nose. He wears the clothing of a psychotic cult leader and claims to of
had a three-way with the star of the local baseball team. And just to kick
up the offensiveness, he will be accompanied to the ring by a black
gentlemen with an umbrella named Mr. Merryweather. If these two ass clowns
don’t kill each other, I’m pretty sure it will have meant the the
terrorists won.

-Funny Uncle Kärl

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