Swope’s Picks: Episode 11 – Doug Vaughn’s “Greatest” Rants

We flash back to December 2010…Doug got pwned by Vincent Jackson…I GUARANT-DAMN-TEE I’LL CUT EVERY ONE OF YOU IF YOU DON’T COVER VINCENT JACKSON…IS THERE ANYBODY IN THE SECONDARY AT ALL WHO SEES NUMBER 83? GET A BODY ON HIM…Doug went through absolute hell at the DMV…couldn’t take the test because he ain’t got TAAAGS…back to the end of the line…WE HAVE STANDINGS, WE DON’T NEED A COMMIT-TAY TO DETERMINE WHO’S ON TOP…Doug impersonates a golf coach…DRIVE FOR SHOW, PUTT FOR DOUGH…REPAIR YOUR BALL MARK…Average kid is out of his parents house at 27…WHERE’S MY EASTER EGG? YOU’RE 22 YEARS OLD…Doug wants his son to get out in front of a fastball…HERE’S YOUR REEE-WARD…JUST ONE TIME CAN WE GET OUT IN FRONT?…Doug spent 5 hours on the phone dealing with cell phone issues…I DON’T EVEN WANT A CELL PHONE ANYMORE…I’M JUST GOING TO OPEN THE WINDOW AND YELL TO THE PEOPLE I NEED TO COMMUNICATE WITH…HOW CAN IT BE SO DIFFICULT? HOW CAN IT TAKE FIVE HOURS ON THE PHONE JUST TO GET A DIFFERENT CELL PHONE?!?…10 points out of Adrian Peterson is all Doug needed, and Bridgewater won’t give him the football…HE HAD THREE CARRIES IN THE FIRST HALF…YOU SCORED THREE POINTS AGAINST THE SAN FRANCISCO 49ERS WHO CAN’T KEEP A DEFENSIVE LINEMAN OUT OF JAIL…GIVE THE BALL TO PETERSON AND LET HIM RUN…I KNOW HE’S RUSTY, HELL HE OUGHTA BE RESTED, HE HASN’T PLAYED IN A YEAR…We’re joined by Doug to discuss about the therapeutic nature of his rants as well as the insane value STL culture places on the status of private high school. Mashup features a little tweaking from Doug, Prod Joe, Tim, Adrien Broner, Paulie Malignaggi, Cat, Plowsy, Lana Rhoades, and Larry Nickel.

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