Without Tiger playing, I really had no interest in watching the Buick Open, so I forced myself to watch the Women's U.S. Open. I really do find women's golf amusing. First off, these girls have the worst short games I have ever seen. Paula Creamer missed at least seven putts of 6 feet or less, and that was just on Sunday. I saw Michelle Wie knock a 20-foot chip 40 yards off the green, Christie Kerr left three in the bunker, and Angela Park bladed a bunker shot 90 yards over the green. I know what your thinking, but Iggy, this is a major, so the course was set up tough. Think again, bogey breath. They played the course as a par 73 with 5 par 5's, no rough to speak of, fast fairways, so length wasn't a problem. They had a 460 yard par-5, and a 232 yard par-4 with no water hazard. Yeah, that's a tough set up for a USGA event. And yet the savior of woman's golf, Michelle Wie, managed to shoot 81-75 for a stellar +10.

As Paula Creamer was choking away another major, InBee Park became the youngest winner in the history of the Women's Open at age 19. That makes the Koreans a 4-0 for the month of June. Park is a very talented player and played brilliantly under pressure. The same can't be said for the young Americans. I hear people say that Creamer is the best player to have never won a major. Give me a break! She has 6 titles but hardly a great player. Plus, she cries too much.

I see a lot of crying on the LPGA Tour. After making double bogey 6 on the short par 4 ninth, Creamer stormed past everyone and walked into the bathroom adjacent to the scorers' tent. She was in there so long that Stacey Lewis hit her drive on ten, then waited another seven minutes for Creamer to exit the bathroom, wearing her sunglasses for the first time all day. Great players don't cry after making bogeys. They shake it off and make a birdie on the next hole. Another case in point was Yani Tseng, who walked off the course in tears after round one of the US Women’s Open. She shot 2-under 71. Why so sad? Tseng hit a 3-wood into the bunker on the par-4 seventh (her 16th) and then three-putted for double bogey. She was 3 under heading into that hole. The 19-year-old cried all the way down the eighth. Didn't this broad just win the McDonalds LPGA 3 weeks ago? My advice to these chicks is to quit crying and call Dave Pelz for a short game lesson.

Now a few more observations from the Women's U.S. Open:

I find it amazing that InBee Park petitioned the LPGA 3 years ago to wave the rule that a player must be 18 to join. She was 16 at the time. The LPGA said no. What I find amazing is that the LPGA waved their rule and let Aree Song become a member in 2003 at age 17. So it's okay for one player but not another? This Tour is such a joke. You want more proof? Here you go. Stacy Lewis, playing in her first tournament as a professional, held the 54 hole lead at the Open before finishing T-3. Did you know that the money she won does not count toward her yearly earnings? Stacey is trying to earn enough money with her exemptions this year to finish in the top 90 on the money list, which will give her exempt status for 2009, thus not having to go through Q-School, but since the LPGA only co-sponsors the U.S. Open with the USGA, the money she earned finishing 3rd doesn't count. Who the fuck came up with that rule? I was told if Stacy had won she would have received a one year exemption for 2009. Then why does InBee Park get a 5 year exemption? Lewis' 160 grand for finishing 3rd would have put her 50th on the 2008 money list. Too bad it doesn't count. Nice going, LPGA.

Now on to one of my favorite topics, awful announcers. Someone, besides me, has to tell Jane Crafter that she is the worst golf commentator of all time. Here are two of my favorite "Crafty's" from this past weekend:

Crafter informs us that "Helen Alfredsson will hit while Park is in the bathroom" just as the camera shows us Park hitting her shot. Are you even in the fairway watching this group?

A few holes later, Crafter says, "This one is headed into the fairway bunker" just as we watch the shot land in the middle of the fairway. She's perfect for The Golf Channel, but I thought NBC had more credibility. Guess not.

The Golf Channel doesn't go unscathed this week either. Then again, whenever Brandy Seymour is on the air, my column writes itself. She's interviewing some R&B singer at the Nationwide celebrity pro-am and asks him, "So what are some of your songs we might be familiar with?" Jesus Christ, how about looking them up before you interview him? I'll cut this bimbo a little slack if she does her interviews topless. Otherwise, get the fuck off the air. That goes for those two douchebags that host the Grey Goose 19th hole as well.

Now that Tiger is done for the year, The Golf Channel needed to find another player's dick to suck, and that dick belongs to Rocco Mediate. Did you catch that love fest Thursday and Friday? My God, you would have thought he had just won the Grand Slam. Then again, TGC is known for sucking up to everyone. When I appeared on The Grey Goose 19th hole a few years back, they asked me what I wanted to talk about in my closing comments segment. I said I wanted to call out the LPGA. Their response, "Oh, you can't do that. We have a relationship with the LPGA." Okay. I'll talk about some players on the PGA Tour who ignore the fans and refuse to sign autographs. Again, "Umm, you can't really say anything negative on the show." What the fuck! So I sat there and agreed with everything Dave Marr said, even though he had no clue what he was talking about. That's TGC in a nutshell. Shills for the game of golf.

I said earlier that Michelle Wie shot 81-75 and missed another cut. So what's next for Michelle? Well, if you listen to her, then listen to her father BJ, you get two different answers.

First, here's Michelle on Q-School: " I think the qualifying conflicts with school, so I probably won't go to that. But hopefully, I'll make enough money this year to get exempt for next year. I'll see how it goes. I'm having a lot of fun playing good again, so that's all I'm focusing on now."

Having fun playing good again? How sad is it when 81-75 is good. So Michelle doesn't think she will go to Q-School. Well, here's BJ, "What other options do we have?" Sounds like he thinks Q-school is a distinct possibility. Maybe Team Wie needs to get on the same page. I'm sure they'll fire a caddy first.

I enjoyed watching Annika hole out from the fairway on 18 Sunday for an eagle. What I didn't enjoy watching was her caddy, Terry McNamara, take off his hat and wave to the crowd like he had actually done something. Then he walks up to the green holding Annika's hand in the air like she just won a title fight. You're a fucking caddy, nothing more. Quit waving to the crowd and acting like the people in the gallery even know who you are. And for those who think this is Annika's final U.S. Open, think again. Mark my words: she'll back within two years.

Congrats are in order to Greg Norman and Chris Evert after tying the knot this past weekend in the Bahamas. The wedding cost two million dollars. I know the Shark can afford it, but two million for a broad that has now been married three times? Together, they have combined to win 20 majors. Hopefully Greg is moving into her house. That way he only has to move two trophies, while she would have to move eighteen.

Anyone see that Lexus commercial where Annika, Chi Chi, Charles Howell III and Ray Floyd run out to drive their Lexus in a race? They all get behind the wheel and speed off, all except Floyd, who gets in the back-seat while someone else drives. What the hell, doesn't he have a license? If not, get someone else who can actually drive. He's not that big a name that he deserves a chauffeur.

I had fun joining Jay Jr. on the Back 9 this past Saturday. We had a spirited discussion on Kenny Perry skipping the U.S. Open qualifier. It wasn't quite the same as talking to a guy who finished 10th at the Desoto Amateur, but a golf show that features two hosts debating a topic can be fun. Perry decided to not play in the Open because he wanted to make the Ryder Cup team and he thought he would play better at Hartford. We all know the story. Well, Perry won this past weekend at the Buick and assured himself a spot on the team. So what's his excuse for now saying he will skip the British Open, and instead, play in Milwaukee? You've already made the team, yet you will skip another major? He said he will play the British next year. Well good for you, Kenny. I just don't get it. He's playing the best golf of his life and, at 47, doesn't have many more chances to win a major, yet he skips two of the majors for Hartford and Milwaukee. Call me stupid, but I just don't get it.

And finally, it seems John Daly has become nothing more than a side show freak. He missed his 7th cut of the year last weekend at the Buick, but he reminded us all that you can take the boy out of Arkansas, but you can't take the hoosier out of the boy. At last week's pro-am, John was hitting tee shots off of beer cans, while his playing partner, Kid Rock, was playing in a set of jean overalls and no shirt. And somehow he keeps getting exemptions without being reprimanded by Tim Finchem. Amazing.